What I Secretly Knew I Always Wanted
by jackandkaren
Summary: Jack needs Karen’s help in assisting him on another one of his manhunts. When the guy doesn’t show however, things take a turn for the unexpected.


The day started off as usual, I came in late for work and Grace gave me a list of clients to call, of which I conveniently misplaced. I was just on my second coat of bright red nail polish when Jack came bursting through the door.

"Hey Kare"

"Hey Poodle" I reply with a grin.

"Ok listen. There's this really hot guy at the library and I need you to come with me"

"Why do you want me to come?" I ask absentmindedly. It's not like it's any news that Jack found a new love interest to pursue.

"Well the library isn't really my forte" Jack replies while stuffing his face with some chocolate chip cookies Grace left on the counter earlier. "I need you to come, and I don't know, watch over me. Make sure it looks like I belong. You know, I really love books suddenly. I think I'm in love with this library guy"

"What's his name honey?"

"Not sure, meet me there at 1!" Jack yells, already halfway to the elevator.

I set my nail polish down, wondering what I could possibly assist Jack with at the library. Isn't he like an expert at picking up guys? Oh well, it'll get me out of this office. I've been overworked lately anyway, just this week I've faxed two papers and answered one phone call, almost two, but then I realized Rosario didn't pack my vodka so I had to go scream at her for a bit. I look at the clock and notice it's quarter to 1 already, so I grab my purse and cream colored fur coat and order Driver to meet me at the doors.

Once in the library, I do a once-over of the place. There's people everywhere, with their gross little children and tragic clothes. I walk into a smaller room to the right, and see Jack looking at a stack of books on a corner shelf. For a moment I don't say anything, I just stare at him. He looks so good today, I note before shaking the thought away. Still I can't help staring at him as his arm reaches up to grab a book too tall for me to ever be able to reach. Out of the corner of his eye he notices me and turns with a smile.

"Look at this one" he says with near-excitement, motioning me over to look at a book with two people making out on the cover.

"Very nice" I say sarcastically before I too start picking books up and surveying their covers. It turns into a game, with Jack and I trying to see who can find the kinkiest cover, and soon our giggles are filling the room.

"So when's your guy coming, honey" I ask.

"I haven't seen him, he might not be coming in today" Jack says with a little pout before choosing a book with two bodies intertwined and we explode in a fit of childish giggles again.

It must've been hours, but somehow we ended up on the floor, Jack leaning against a shelf and me laying flat across his legs on my back. By now we've ran out of books to laugh at and Jack is absently stroking my hair, which I've decided to leave down today.

"Do you think I'll ever find true love Kare" Jack says, with a different tone in his voice than I'm used to. This isn't the normally playful and flirtatious Jack I see all the time. He's raw in this moment, and waiting for my response.

"Of course, honey" I reply.

We sit in silence for a few minutes before he shifts and I sit up.

"Have you ever been in love?" He asks abruptly.

I fidget before saying "I mean, I love Stan.."

"No" he cuts me off. "I mean the kind of love you know you can't have. The kind of love that you would give anything for just a moment."

I feel like I've been punched in the gut. Like something hit me so hard it takes my breath away and leaves me fumbling for words. I can't do anything but look at him. We make eye contact and I see his bright blue eyes staring back at me, and I'd do anything to know what he is thinking in this moment.

"I have to go to the bathroom" I blurt out, and make my way down the hall, nearly collapsing in front of the sink mirror. I stare at my reflection and try to think of how to play this off. My panicked behavior, quickly disappearing into the bathroom, the 30 second unbreaking eye contact. I've been so busy thinking about what he was thinking, I say to myself, I haven't even reflected on what I'M thinking. No, this is too much; I think, as I grab my flask from my coat pocket and take a swig before marching through the doors.

Jack is in the same place I left him, obviously in deep thought. When he sees me, he stands up and I walk to him. I'm not sure if it's the whiskey or what, but suddenly I find myself grabbing his face and bringing his lips to mine. He parts his, and our lips connect. We've made out many times before but this time..this time it's different. It's gentle, but passionate at the same time. I can feel my cheeks flush as he pulls me closer and slips his tongue into my mouth. My whole body feels limp and I realize I have never felt like this in my life. I want him. I want every part of him and I want it now. We pull away for a second, his arms still around me tightly so we're just far enough away to make eye contact. I look into both of his eyes and say "Yes." A brief answer to his earlier question. Something in his face lights up before getting serious again and pushing me gently against a large shelf in the secluded room of the library. We're so far back that we know the chances of someone entering is slim. He lifts me slightly and I throw my legs around his waist, wanting nothing more in this moment than to feel him inside of me, to feel that last barrier between us disappear. To finally become one with the man I've secretly been in love with for years. As if he can read my mind, he swiftly pushes my coat back so it falls off my shoulders and onto the carpeted floor below us, and before I know it my shirt and bra are off as well. He starts fondling me as I rip off his shirt and start to unbutton his pants. He complies and pulls his pants all the way off, his underwear following right behind. I look down and see Jack like I've never seen him before. Like I've always dreamed of seeing him. I slip my panties off and we continue to passionately kiss, our tongues moving rhythmically in eachother's mouth. I physically cannot take the waiting anymore as my body aches for him and I whisper "please" against his lips. He takes this as cue and enters me, pushing deep into me as I let out a loud moan. As he moves in and out, I know there isn't anything in this world that could be better than this moment. Our bodies feel like they were made for eachother as pleasure overflows us. He comes in me and I immediately follow, and we part while both panting, our hot breath filling the space between us. We don't say anything as we both dress ourselves, and Jack puts his hand on my face before turning away. I have a million questions flooding my mind but I don't dare say anything, as to not mess up what just happened. We walk halfway out of the room before Jack turns around and faces me. I stop walking and look at him, fearing what he might say.

"I love you Karen"

My breath catches in my throat as he turns around and walks out the door.


End file.
